are you settling?

We've all been told to never settle for less than we deserve. Usually it comes from our parents, family, close friends, or lovers; a group of people who cares about your happiness and well-being above all else. Often straight from the heart, uttering these words is usually a result of: 1. Witnessing specific people taking advantage of you [ie: dating someone that doesn't appreciate you, dealing with friends who don't look out for your best interest, spending time with people that drain your emotionally, letting people put you down]. Or 2. Watching you take advantage of yourself  [ie: staying at a job that makes you miserable, choosing a career path that isn't right for you, putting yourself in bad situations repetitively, living in a place you hate].

Most of us, more or less, understand what someone is getting at when they tell you that you shouldn't settle for less than you deserve in life. The hardest part is realizing that you can do far better in life than what you may be allowing yourself at this very moment. The tragedy of it all doesn't lie in recognizing the disappointment first hand, the tragedy is many of us continue to stay in a situation because it's what's easier. We stay at a job because it's a paycheck and the job market right now is a struggle. We stay with a boyfriend or girlfriend because it's easier than being alone, and having to move our stuff out of the mutual apartment would be too much work. We go to and stay in college because it's what's expected from our parents. We stay in a tough marriage out of fear of disappointing our families. We continue to let friends borrow money or bail them out of trouble because we feel guilty when you don't. We continue to feed into our unhealthy physical health because we're lazy. Regardless of what the situation may be, we need to stop thinking about what's easier and start thinking about what's best for ourselves. It's ok to be selfish in life. It's ok to want nothing short of the best. But what isn't ok is making excuses for why we aren't experiencing life to it's fullest at this very moment. We have a mere 100 years to live, and each day should be lived to it's fullest. We should never find ourselves caught in ordinary, when we can be living extraordinarily. If you are caught in mediocrity, why not push yourself to new heights? Why settle for a lifetime of somewhere in the middle?

 The important part of breaking the cycle is admitting you are settling. You have to take your head out of the sand and recognize that you are not truly happy. Everyone is capable of happiness- but you have to work for it. Happiness isn't handed to you, you have to commit yourself to creating a lifestyle and surrounding yourself with people that will help you to get the most out of life. Anything in life is achievable, and that's what many people refuse to believe. Life is too short to be pessimistic- looking on the "bright side" of things is sometimes the best way to go. The world can be a terrible, tragic, and depressing place at times; many of us know this first hand. But the truth of the matter is that your world can be comprised of less sadness than you may think. There are going to be things that happen that you cannot control. Good or bad, happy or sad. Take control of your life and your happiness. Hold yourself accountable for the life you are choosing to live right now. If you know you can do better, you can get more out of life, and you are determined to live with passion, then DO IT. You will have setbacks, roadblocks, and days you question if taking the path less traveled is truly worth it. Someday you will stop and realize what an incredible life you have created for yourself. It won't be perfect, but it will be one you can take responsibility for. You will give yourself a pat on the back for insisting on living a life of major accomplishments, happiness, passion, and personal love. If you are well on your way there already, then be proud of yourself! Too many people go through a life of mediocrity, but realistically no person should ever have to settle for less than they deserve. Set high standards for yourself, and surround yourself with people- friends, significant others, coworkers, trainers, doctors, and family- that have your best interest in mind and will support you on your quest to improving your life.

The biggest human temptation is to settle for too little. -Thomas Merton