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10.06.2011

the view through rose-colored glasses.

We are faced with thousands of choices every single day, most of which we don't even realize we are making. You chose to open your eyes. You chose to turn your alarm off. You chose to get up. You chose to make your bed. You chose to get in the shower. You chose what you were going to wear. You chose to get into your car. You chose to go to work. Or maybe you chose not to get out of bed. Chose not to shower, or dress, or go to work. Regardless of how you got to this point today, you are now sitting here reading this post.

And just like we choose how we go through every day, we also choose our outlook and perspective on life. We have experiences and people that have shaped us into who and what we are today. So we sit here on October 6th, 2011 and I have to ask, is your glass half-full or half-empty? Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist? We all have those days (or weeks) when we can't help but assume the worst, worry the most, complain about everything, and be the worst kind of Debbie Downer in existence. But it's like that famous quote from Blow:
"Sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust, and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems, and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again, but life goes on."
Being an occasional pessimist can be justified- we can't expect to never get down on life. Terrible things happen and we have to cope. There is a specific process we go through including periods of anger and sadness. This is usually followed by justification, and finally acceptance and forgiveness. The point is that pessimism is legitimate in small bouts, but we shouldn't go through life in this manner- for some reason, some of us truly do. And maybe that pessimism is justified by our past experiences. Things like; My last boyfriend cheated on me, so this one will too. My parents got divorced, so real love must not exist. My sister got cancer, so terrible things happen to good people. I found a text message in my boyfriends phone from his Ex, so he must still love her. My father used to hit me, so he hates me. My best friend was killed in a car accident, so people can't be trusted. My friend never emailed me back, so she must be mad at me. My wife had an affair, so I must be unworthy. I just got fired, so I must not be good enough. I'm overweight, so no one will ever love me.

We have all caught ourselves doing this. Growing up my parents used to always say, "Stop feeling bad for yourself." I used to get so annoyed when they told me this, but in hindsight they couldn't have been more right. We are making a choice to sit there and sulk in our unhappiness, rather than trying to turn it around. 

 If you've been in a funk lately, it's time to break free. You have got to force the fact that life is too short to look through broken glasses instead of rose-colored ones on yourself. Because it is. Life is short. People come and go. Cherish what you have each and every day because you don't know what tomorrow will bring- and I mean that in the most optimistic way. You have to learn to trust that life works out. That everything happens for a reason. That timing is everything. You have to learn that you will get hurt, damaged emotionally, and it will change you as a person. You have to remember that life is hard and sometimes it feels like a roller coaster ride that's doomed to crash and burn. Life isn't a walk in the park and neither are relationships. Relationships require work. They require sacrifice and compromise. They require honesty and integrity. Trust and communication. Life requires hard work. You have to push yourself. You have to actively pursue your goals. Things don't often just get handed to you. You have to pursue new opportunities with an open mind. You will have to forgive yourself for your mistakes. Learn that you will hurt people in profound ways; whether it's on purpose or not. Words can kill. Poor choices will be made. Hindsight is always 20/20. Rejection hurts. Love is unexplainable. Hearts break. Disappointment happens. 

But at the end of the day remember this; life is too short to hold back. Wake up every day knowing you will do everything in your power to make it better than yesterday. Push yourself to great heights. If you fall, pick yourself up again. Share your thoughts with no reservations. And above all, know that the only worry you should have is that one day you will look back in regret that you never had gave yourself the opportunity to live your life to its absolute fullest. Each day should be treated as a blessing, a blank slate; one in which you have taken everything from your past, reflected upon it, and then pushed forward in the most profound way.

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